The one thing I can unequivocally endorse in the New Weird America are the band names. Like, totally! I mean, I know the music is trying to be crazy & everything, but sometimes the sound's never gonna be as over-the-top as the name. I could give examples, but c'mon! You know what I'm talkin about. Do you really need me to guide your little finger in the direction to point 'n laugh? Nope! Sometimes I wonder what would've happened in Rhode Island if Harry Pussy'd never played up there. The hypothesis is mind boggling.
But there ain't nothin nobody can do about that now. I was just countin my good fortune the other day when a folded up pie-tin (wrapped in blue painters tape) arrived from a cdr label called WFOT intent on challengin my cheery mood. Thankfully there was just a couple've releases inside-still alive too-so it only took about a half'n hour to get in 'n free them little bastards from that mangled mess. My hands felt like the jaws of life rescuin them cdr's; they was covered in crumbs 'n pie residue (strawberry? rhubarb? it was hard to tell exactly) but after a bit of spiffin up, they looked & played just fine. At least I think so. I dunno, I'll let y'all fill in the blanks on these ones. I will say this; I pretty sure there's another new psychedelic movement afoot. That is if your willing to accept tequila 'n percoset's as the new marijuana & LSD. I know it ain't the same but I think that's the point.
Spectre Flux 'Agouc' cdr
To their truest & dearest fans, __________are the best band ever! No band can possibly match them in terms of atmosphere & intensity. To think that a band of this magnitude could exist AND have come from planet Earth? It is almost incomprehensible to contemplate. And it is for this reason that fans of __________are so devoted. It is as though they have died & gone to Heaven. The band members are Gods & the fans're Angels. Life in Heaven is show after show, release after release & they are always great! Great playing, great cdr's, great fans, great times! Gods & Angels.....together! They want someone to pinch them but that wouldn't do any good. They are already in Heaven. Also in Heaven there is never any mention of __________ or __________ because those bands are still on earth. The agonizing pursuits of fame & fortune are useless in Heaven. It is blissful an all gnarlizing. The term "originality" is obsolete & besides, what does it mean anyway? It is all about pretending. If you pretend well enough, anything is possible. Even a life in Heaven. Look at what it has done for __________. Isn't Heaven great?
Warmer Milks 'Aja Braun' cdr
To their truest & dearest fans, __________are the best band ever! No band can possibly match them in terms of atmosphere & intensity. To think that a band of this magnitude could exist AND have come from planet Earth? It is almost incomprehensible to contemplate. And it is for this reason that fans of __________are so devoted. It is as though they have died & gone to Heaven. The band members are Gods & the fans're Angels. Life in Heaven is show after show, release after release & they are always great! Great playing, great cdr's, great fans, great times! Gods & Angels.....together! They want someone to pinch them but that wouldn't do any good. They are already in Heaven. Also in Heaven there is never any mention of __________ or __________ because those bands are still on earth. The agonizing pursuits of fame & fortune are useless in Heaven. It is blissful an all gnarlizing. The term "originality" is obsolete & besides, what does it mean anyway? It is all about pretending. If you pretend well enough, anything is possible. Even a life in Heaven. Look at what it has done for __________. Isn't Heaven great?
(Contact WFOT via trettman@hotmail.com)
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