Thursday, May 25, 2006

Does Anyone Remember Laughter?.....The Glands Of External Secretion's 'Northern Exposure Will Be Right Back' lp

I'm just back from the 1st Annual Napa Noise Symposium that was held in Yountville, Ca this past weekend. Got to see alot've old faces & squeeze some new ones too (a big high 5 goes out to Diapers from the band, Grecian Formula 80 Proof for the bottle've Ouzo. I owe you dude, bigtime!). Hurley's became our de facto HQ & I had a right nice time jawin w/this woman Libbey Adams about the Cali noise scene. To tell ya the truth, the details of our conversation are a little blurry to me now (Anchor Steam rules!) but I remember her beatin it into my head that Glands Of External Secretion were more important to the scene than Minimal Man and Factrix. As it turns out, international Noise aficionado, Campbell Campbell (from Campbeltown, Scotland) was gonna give a readin the next day about how come 'Northern Exposure Will Be Right Back' was the Glands best & most popular album. We was all wringin our hands w/gleeful anticipation over that! Then later that night as I was sleepin, I got bit in the face by a bat that had somehow flew inside the back window of my rental car. My face blew up to about 10 times it's normal size, shit, I looked like that dude Rocky in 'Mask'! They went 'n airlifted me outta there down to a SF hospital that took my insurance plan. All's I remember was the attendin doctor wanted me to call him 'Whispering Duck' then all've a sudden he went 'n lanced the bite, stuck his face down in it & sucked all the bat shit outta my cheek. He made some war whoop, then proceeded to dance around the bed, laughin & sputterin to himself before passin out cold. I checked the fuck outta that place then 'n there! I swear, I believe they'd give a doctor's license to just about any ol' Indian that went & asked for one. Ain't it enough that they don't pay taxes? Don't get me started!
So I missed the readin. But I emailed Campbell Campbell about it & got a very informative reply which I'm all too happy to share. Here it is;

Yo Woods-

Hey man, sorry about the bat in your belfry. That sucks-pun intended (LOL)! Here's hoping that you don't turn into some Vampire or Caped Crusader. That's right, your already an asshole. Too late! Hah! So yes, the reading went off without a hitch. Could have done with a few more people, but the picnic table was full and interested, so no worries. Someone was passing around your Uncle's taffies which were exceptional.Hat's off there. So why am I so high on 'Northern Exposure'? Good question, I'd have to say mainly it's the perfect medium between Glass' best period of Bananafish which translates to stellar aural collage stitchery + Manning's channeling of Damo Suzuki by way of Phones Sportsman = one damn fine lp. As the record opens, one is transported into a fantastical world of the classic SF music scene. I'm not talking about Quicksilver or the Grateful Dead (hungry!), nor am I referring to Chrome or Flipper (feed me!), but Thinking Fellers & World Of Pooh (Gub! Gub!). There is lot's of shimmer & shine, some of Manning's words are of such a higher key I wonder why they have not been anthologized in the Ecstatic Peace Poetry Journal. The best of this lp is comprised on so many levels one cannot help but feel incredulous. Like I have stated earlier, lot's of what is "good" on here wistfully recalls the more esoteric moments of Swell Maps 'Jane From Occupied Europe' or a Can smoke break, but then Glass & Manning drop an o & it becomes "God". Like when it gnashes via Morton Feldman & Joan LaBarbara chewing a rusty hotdog, cries like Masonna trying to wriggle out of quicksand filled with liquid ether & wasbai powder, or thrusts itself, like a heat seeking bowling ball, into a lane full of Z'ev filled ten pins. For those of you not paying attention let me also add Department Store Santas, Velvet Underground, Theatre Of Eternal Music and Los Angeles Free Music Society. Oh, and Sun Ra. Thank you.
So I assume you get the picture. Call it noise, cutups, collage, whatever; 'Northern Exposure Will Be Right Back' is definitely a defining moment in definitive. I highly recommend it with my most highest possible recommendation. If you do not already own it, try
It's 11 years old now. Hard to believe. I have heard cassettes & cdr's of recent bands stamped with skulls & unicorns that wish they sounded as fresh. Of course, those are no longer around. This still is. A funny old world we live in. It's good crack. Check it out.

Be sure to eat your garlic!


Campbell Campbell

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Anyone Can Get To Doodyville, Just Close Your Eyes & Wish.....Vetiver's 'To Find Me Gone' CD

I was readin somewhere the other day that the last Clarabell The Clown recently died from prostate cancer. "Geez" I thought to myself, "how sad". I bet them fops from Vetiver must be really broken up. They've gone & based a whole act around dressin 'n actin like characters from the Hoody Doody Show. I hope they have plenty of soft pillows to bite so's to help muffle their sadness.But on the upside of things, maybe a little real press is what they need. Up to now, everbody seems to think this bunch invented puppet folk.However, that heinous distinction would have to be bestowed on their puppeteer, Buffalo Bob Banhart. But enough about him. Go get your copy of 'To Find Me Gone' & let's take a trip through the new Doodyville shall we?
Ah, puppet folk....the kids love it too! 'To Find Me Gone' really delivers all the clown magic 'n dopey faux 60's outsider vibes one would expect from a paint-by-numbers outfit like Vetiver. They were smart to hide behind the Howdy Doody folk/psych illusion. Look at'em; Phineas T. Bluster, Dilly Dally, Princess Summerfall Winterspring & Howdy Doody himself. Is that Captain Windy Scuttlebutt I see shakin a tambourine? Sure looks like him from here! Boy, they almost sound just like the old Howdy Doody. Except newer. And contrived. And precious. It's like they was really hexed by the Mangle Wurzel 'n who am I to argue w/a bunch of puppets, especially one's dressed up like sad Haight/Ashbury reenactors? I am but one voice. I realize there are legions of misguided youth out there among you who never got to see the Flapdoodle in action. It gave you whatever you asked for, so long as it was good. That's how I got all my albums by COB, ISB, Forest, Dr. Strangely Strange & the like. And while Vetiver have really pulled off an authentic 3 dollar bill version of those sounds, they forgot the Flapdoodle. Still, I think they've gotten what they wanted. It's just that it's not good.
But like I said, that's just one opinion. If they was playin Knotts Berry Farm or Sesame Place I could understand, but......this time the bear ate me. Kids can't wait to sit lotus style on dirty barroom floors, shotgun clove smoke into each other's piercing stations 'n nod off to this stuff. It's a whole new Peanut Gallery out there & if they wanna spend their allowance yawning along to this, hey, that's show business. Me, I'm doin this deal w/this dude I just met who calls himself Dogpaw. He's got a beard 'n long hair & wears overalls w/o a shirt. Sometimes he's even sportin a nutty, sorry, VINTAGE hat, always perched at a jaunty angle. Anyway, he's got this rad idea to start a label to document the up 'n coming Delaware noise band scene. CASSETTE'S ONLY! Real small editions too. Aw man, it's gonna be scuzzywuzzymuzzy. I'm all gnarled up about it! That's where the real aktion is. See ya later!

Sunday, May 14, 2006

To Mom On Mothers Day.....Siltblog Top 10 for 5/14/06

I was recently asked to chef, curate (love that word!) & DJ a Mothers Day Brunch for a chapter of the Daughters Of The American Revolution at the Casimir Pulaski Fox And Hound Club in Chalfont, PA. I won't show you the menu I came up with (too awesome!) but below is a list of the 10 most requested records from my collection for said occasion. These ladies really know how to celebrate. Bon Appetit!

1; The Execute-An Omen Of Fear ep
2; Timmothy-Strange But True lp (Mr Woodbe; original Pear pressing please!)
3; NNCK-The Circle Broken cassette (edition of 50, Nick Cain copy ONLY)
4; David Welch-Blue Lightning Accent-lp
5; Doden-Sluten Psykiatrisk Vard ep
6; Dave Bixby-Ode To Quetzalcoatl lp
7; Sickness-Corpse Monger 7"
9; From Rexella With Love-Hawaii lp
10; Endless Boogie-Boogie Sicodelico lp (Mr Woodbe; this would be the white lp.)

We hope this list isn't an inconvenience. Your menu looks divine & I speak for all the Daughter's when I say that we are expecting this to be the finest Mothers Day Brunch in our chapter's history. Thank you so much in advance.


Myrtle Hale
(Great, great, great, great, great, great, granddaughter of Nathan Hale)

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Maybe They Meant Velvet Underground, The Novel....The Black Angels 'Passover' CD

(Note; the following entry was taken from the diary of one Ms. Sarah Duncan, former editor of the fanzine, Cherry Coke. Thanks to Jordan Duncan for passing it along. RW)

Dear Diary;

Derby Day is here & I should be really stoked (I just love muddling sticks!) but I am sort of depressed. You know Diary, I always try to find the best in music, but I think for this cd by The Black Angels called 'Passover', I have run out of good words. They are really bad! And I am not even considering their preening hipster isms or dilettante, by-the-numbers poseur je ne sais quoi. Or the obvious nod in the band name to Velvet Underground. You have to expect that from a group with little original talent. Besides the name, they have based their sound and style around VU too, specifically, the 60's era version. It is enough to make me laugh to the point of crying, or maybe just one or the other. But since I don't know any of them (thankfully!), I think I'll just stick to laughing. The cd started out well enough, the first song has legs (that is what Aunt Buttons says when she swishes wine around in her glass) but they just don't walk anywhere very interesting. The second track 'The First Vietnamese War' is where they really lost me. The music is strong, but the lyrics are so affected and ridiculous that I had to go to their webpage to check how they weighed in on themselves. I figured it would be totally pretentious and I was not let down. The guitarist, Christian Bland (do you think that is his "punk" name?) had this to say; "We love the Velvet Underground. They represent the evil side of the Sixties." Then later; "The entire album parallels what's going on now with what happened in the Sixties. We do have a message and it's one of getting people to open up their minds so they can let everything come through" Can someone please turn off the laughing gas? I think I'm going to be sick! I cannot speak from experience since I wasn't even born in the Sixties but my Dad can. "What's going on now is sad but it doesn't compare. When they resort to drafting young men into their bloodletting machine then it will come closer. But as it stands, this is a grim, pathetic spectacle, a selfish, needless folly. It's ludicrous, but until more people start to care, others will just never learn." Gosh Diary, is that really my Dad or some totally awesome wizard who just knows everything? If I didn't know better I would have thought he was talking about this Black Angels cd. It's selfish, pathetic,needless and ludicrous too. But then, I am not an expert! If I were I would have said that Black Angels don't bring to mind or ears the Velvet Underground so much as they do Christian Death. There is a Gothic undertow that permeates their sound and singer Alex Maas' vocal affectations recall Roz Williams way more than Lou Reed or Nico. Alright, being generous I'll say he sounds like Roz Williams after the roof of his mouth has been swabbed with some Nico heroin snot. Okay, okay, maybe he sounds a little like Lou Reed too. With Billy Name's nutsac on his chin! Oh Diary, when I resort to thoughts and language such as this, it is time to bid adieu. Perhaps if I knew less or wanted a job in the music industry I would find The Black Angels to be stunning and genius, you know, like Brian Jonestown Massacre. But I don't. I can't even stand to read Pitchfork.
Okay Diary, the race is about to begin. I have bet 10$ on a horse named Barbaro to win. Everybody's says I don't know what I'm doing but I remain undeterred. I am going with my gut. And it has never let me down. Just like you.

Okay Diary, goodbye! Till next time we meet.



Monday, May 08, 2006

In The Land Of The Midnight Stun....Maniacs Dream 'Die, Learn, No Way' LP

For damn near the better part've this decade I was stricken by a malaise of an undeterminable nature. It wasn't rickets or scurvy-though they both run in my family-but a sort've lingerin ennui. It even followed me up here to the Fishtown. I remember talkin about it to some clown from the Lily's & he suggested EST. I almost bit then he capped it off by sayin "Look what it did for Veronica Breth"? I thought it was a joke till I heard him tell the bartender "Frangelica on the rocks & keep'em comin". There was no hope. It's like I was bloated, I felt super fat & bustin out all over. My self esteem was at an all time low! MG just laughed & said it was the longest manstrual cycle she's ever seen a fella go through. I laughed back 'n said nothing was longer than that stick she had up her ass. For that I caught the corner of a souvenir glass ashtray that damn near took my scalp clean off. I guess it was touch & go for a while after that. When I finally come outta the coma I was 50 stitches heavier, but 15 lbs lighter. Not a diet I'd recommend, but hey, it worked for me. They finally released MG from the clink & one of the deputies escorted her to Intensive Care & we made up. She promised it'd never happen again on account've the fact that she'd quit smokin.Seems the whole time she was locked up, she weren't allowed to. And besides, they was holdin the ashtray for evidence & there was no way in hell we was goin all the way back to Branson for another one. I know there's plenty of lessons to be learned from this story, but the one I took with me was if you listen loudest & clearest, then there ain't no time to be feelin sorry for your self. That & cigarettes can kill ya, in more ways than one.
But it's the former that stuck out when I played this Maniacs Dream lp on HP Cycle. It's one I missed cause've all them pity parties. Released sometime in 04 or 05 'Die, Learn, No Way' zapped me like a pre-cog taser & I only just heard it this past month. It was like a prophecy of predestination comin true; the wilderness where Faust had plowed stones, This Heat had tilled soil & Dead C had planted seeds, now Maniacs Dream were the bearers of a bountiful harvest. The record consists of 2 side long themes that unfurl organic flora'n fauna ripe in atavistic lung gurgle, exuberant & dense guitar/drum tangles as well as a whole batch've other luxuriant instrumentation layered in to create a lush fragrance of extraordinary, turned on Rock that is-in a word-Edenic. There is mention of Finnish brethren such as Avarus & others whose names're too long to spell, but I think the pollen count on this is way more formidable than any of them, so.... Tearjerks 'n Snifflers need not make the trip. Besides, it was pressed in some micro edition of 420 copies & it's damn near 2 yrs old. I've encountered a couple've folks who claim to be allergic, but me, hell, if they could bottle it, I'd drink their air for breakfast, lunch & dinner. In fact, I can't wait for the second round. Bring it on!

('Die, Learn, No Way' might still be available via or )

Monday, May 01, 2006

Phil Niekro & Charlie Hough All Rolled Into One.....Tori Kudo/La Consumption 4's 'Atlantic City' LP

To say that Tori Kudo is an enigma would be a supreme understatement. At least in my culture bunker anyways. The first encounter w/him was the Noise/Tenno cd I bought at Adult Crash way back in '97. That cd, w/it's eerie ecclesiastical organ hum & fragile human vocal ache was so supremely devastating that I actually resorted to a little research to find out all I could about it. Turns out it was a re-release from an obscure lp whose origin went back to 1980 & was the work of one Tori Kudo & his wife, Reiko. Then a little bird hipped me that Kudo was the kingpin behind a band called Maher Shabal Hash Baz who had released a 3 lp set entitled 'Return Visit To Rock Mass' the previous yr & was still around. I looked into it but found that the dollars asked to obtain a copy was more than my trust fund would allow. And since I didn't know where any bodies was buried, it wasn't likely I was gonna be able to blackmail anyone into gettin me a free one. I did get to hear some of it once & I dunno, maybe I was fightin the demons of covet, but it sounded awful cutesy-pie to me then. I know there's a ton've stuff out there now & I am curious to give that horse another ride, especially since I've been diggin this new archival release of his entitled 'Tori Kudo/La Consumption 4- Atlantic City' that's just out on the Siwa label.
I seen it in the store the other day & asked the fella behind the counter to tell me what he knew. From his description it sounded like it had all the bling I was lookin for; one-man-alone, armed w/guitar, 4-track & pignose amp, holed up in a cheap motel in Atlantic City sometime in 1981, pourin his cracked heart out in fuzzy confessional mode. What's 20$ when you can walk around sportin a rock like that? Sold! So okay, it turns out some of the yarn is apocryphal; the insert says it's recorded in NYC & the only reference to AC is the title & perhaps the cover photo. And on a couple've tracks he's joined by 'La Consumption 4' but that's all it says. Other than that everything seems on the up 'n up & I don't know if it's 'cause it's from a bygone era that nailed the pitch, but this is a flawless gem of early 80's idiosyncratic knuckleball shine that delivers & delivers hard. So hard in fact that I am adding it to my starting rotation that includes other likeminded bafflers of the art such as Alex Chilton's 'Dusted In Memphis', Little Stevie McCabe's 'Sweat It Out', Eric Hysteric's 'The Crazy King' & Michio Kadotani's 'Rotten Telepathies'. You can shake 'n jumble them letters anyway you like, but around here they always come out spellin 'Cooperstown'.
So yeah, great stuff. All's I need now is a few more lame promo's & I'm goin right up 'n turn'em in to get that MSHB cd that's out on PSF. Who knows, maybe I'll be eatin crow for dinner that night. I've been told if ya cook it right it's deee-licious!

'Atlantic City' can be found at & or contact Siwa direct at