Monday, December 11, 2006
What's The Difference Between Another Noise Rock Band & A Bucket Of Shit?.....Howlin Magic's S/T Cd
It wasn't all that long ago when somebody asked for a moratorium on bands usin the name 'Wolf' as a callin card. There is a bunch of'em
too, most as sad & borin as the day is long. This year Howlin was the name that caught on. Howlin this & Howlin that. 2006, the year Howlin broke....funny ain't it? Okay it's not. It's sad. Sad 'cause none of the Howlin bands I heard really howled. Whined maybe, rocked a little, stomped around. No howlin though & not all that convincin to my ears. But the name's trendy & carries a certain cache I reckon. I'm just waitin for some dumb duck's to come along & call themselves Howlin Wolf, thinkin that they's bein original. Mark my words, it'll happen. Probably come out on Sub Pop too, who'll put a spin on it & have it wreakin of irony. Some dud at Pitchfork will pick it up & run with it &...... gettin depressed? Hold on, I ain't even wrote nothin about Howlin Magic yet!
Listenin to the Howlin Magic cd, my 1st thought was that K-Tel came back in business. You know, cashin in on the New Weird America scene. Howlin Magic got all the moves & noises down pat, the results of which are as sterile as an operatin room. The guitars squall-just like their supposed to-the drums thud w/feral intentions, there's lot's of obligatory extraneous "found" crap, on the whole the thing is sufficiently "gnarly". On top of that, the artwork & layout is so incredibly lame that if I didn't know better I'd have thought it was the work of somebody w/a bone to pick takin the piss, you know, like the Pork Dukes. Stoic believers in the New Weird America bible live by a mantra that all noise is cool, so if they's butterin your bread, this is essential. I mean it has to be, cause it sounds just like everybody else. If this was a cdr I wouldn't have even bothered, but somebody's went & started a label w/this shit, got themselves a barcode & everything. Couldn't they have just saved that money & gone to law school instead? I guess that don't have the same resonance of cool down to the Tonic or Pink Pony or wherever. But hey, if bands could sue for blatant thievery, the brain-trust at Azul Discografia would know the error of their decision. If this is what's passin for Pollander All Fruit in the scene right now then alls I gotta say is make mine w/jelly!
And before I forget,the answer is-the bucket.